Frate Indovino: December Divining

Caption: "The law is equal for all but more equal for some."

Well, that's a change from the sentimentality expected throughout this time of year in the U.S.

And a more honest appraisal than publicly acceptable here, at any time.

In any case, the theme is that justice has always been elusive:

As far back as the ancient Greeks, Plutarch complained that "the spiders' weavings blindside flies, but leave hornets alone," and the Latin poet Juvenal stigmatized the censors who "forgave the crows, but made havoc with doves." And many centuries later, things have not changed much, and people say it this way: "In jail he who steals wood, on the throne he who steals a kingdom"; "Many times money and friendship, break the legs of justice" etc., etc. ...

After more quotes and expressions highlighting the theme, there's a long passage about the the slow wheels of justice... Which I can't quite follow, but: it seems to be about an Italian incident [or more than one incident] involving a legal [and maybe political] conflict, that began in 1816 and ended in 2001 [? - the math doesn't quite seem to work, either].

The writer says the dispute ended only

... because the losing party did not contest the umpteenth ruling issued, just think: after 192 years!

The mini-essay concludes that

The justice of God is a bit different but equally "mysterious," as evidenced by the fact that the first to "steal" paradise was the good thief.

Perhaps an inspiring seasonal reference there, after all.

In other wisdom, the almanac says:

A Dicembre nevoso - segue anno fruttuoso
Snowy December - a fruitful year follows

In the skies:

A total lunar eclipse on the 21st, visible from Asia, Australia, the Pacific, America and Europe, and lasting 3 hours 29 minutes.

Also:

Magnetic storms will influence the weather, with the possibility of gales and storms at sea... in the first ten days: negative influences on mental activity.

"First ten days": quite early for holiday behavior, American-style.

Though with the opening of the shopping season having been pushed to the night of Thanksgiving and following dawn, this may fit here, after all.

Sadly, the year of visiting with Frate Indovino is coming to an end.

One last bit of wisdom, as we wave bye-bye to crazy, dear Italy:

Besides death, three things are certain for the Italians: the New Year's television horoscope, the size of the budget, and the soccer league.

Frate Indovino: Penultimate Prognostications

Cartoon: "Dalla coda riconosci la volpe" — Recognize the fox by her tail

Written over a year ago, yet—as if the cartoonist were channeling a message about Election Day, USA.

Or—could it be that the good brother from another realm is picking up signals from a deceitful Fox of a very different magnitude of con artistry?

Below the cartoon is this month's mini-essay of quotations. Title is in the artist's lettering, and seems to read, "Conosco più d'un gatto ch' è disposto a vende er fumo pè magnà l'arrosto"

That may be a bit off, or the problem with translating could be abbreviations or slang. But the idea seems to be, "Know that more than one cat is ready to sell smoke as a tasty roast."

Yes: all good advice, and easily applied to our elections tomorrow.

A couple of other apt thoughts, from the daily almanac:

Da giudice che pende – giustizia invan s'attende
From a hanging judge – one expects justice in vain

Which sure will fit anyone falling for the manipulations of the ultra-rich—instead of having the sense to vote in the interest of themselves, and practically everyone else.

Then there's:

Ricordare storie vecchie – fa venire collera nuova
Remembering old stories brings new anger.

Good advice for our Confederate voters—if only they would heed it.

Especially when—as so often—the meaning of "stories" is really, "myths."

Among this month's Spiritual Thoughts:

L'unico modo per rimanere fedeli al futuro consiste nel non tradire il presente. (A. Pronzato).

The only way to remain faithful to the future is to not betray the present.

Frate Indovino: October Oracle

Cartoon: "Getting by, Italian art"

From this, we arrive at the timely theme, "Mi Rifuto" o "Mi Riciclo" ["I Refuse" or "I Recycle"]—

Remember the joke about the child who ran into the house: "Papa, Papa, the man with the garbage is here!"
- "Tell him we don't want any more, we already have plenty!" And we're filling up with more and more. The Tuscans say: "Pork fat was never clean," but it's true that waste from consumption has become so cumbersome and unwieldy that no one wants it, though, thanks to the Italian art of getting by, there is always someone who can profit from it. How hard it is to be like the sun, shining on the manure pit without getting dirty! Now the watchword is to recycle. Italy is starting to, but many are still upset and like Hamlet in our common dilemma: "To refuse or to recycle?" Others are playing the blame game so that many landfills are like the conscience: "clean, because unused." I come back to the bitter prophecy of Chief Seathl [Sealth; Seattle], of the Duwamish Indian tribe, contained in a letter written to the president of the United States, Franklin Pierce, in 1855: "You will die buried under your waste." We don't know whether the wise Seathl, were he living today, would refer only to landfills, or to other kinds of garbage, such as television, print media, politics, etc... but his words continue to hang over our heads like a sword of Damocles, as the sun continues to shine "on the human tragedies"

Now there's some food for thought... even if the writing style for this department is always a run-on bunch of "on the one hand/on the other hand" points, interspersed with quotes.

In one of the many small sidebar items, we find this piece of wisdom attributed to a later (naturalized) American—

L'alcool è un liquido prezioso; conserva tutto...tranne i segreti
- C. Grant

Alcohol is a precious liquid: it preserves everything... and keeps secrets

Frate Indovino: September Sage

Gli affari sono affari! - "Business is business!"

No further comment needed there...

So instead: this month we look at the Frate's fine print.

The calendar is crammed full of miscellaneous items—in assorted fonts that don't scan legibly. So I've only been able to do quick selections for typing into the translator.

I hadn't looked closely at the monthly list of saints and saints-in-waiting [the latter are names preceded by "B." for "Beato"—beatified]. I just assumed the line of text below each name must explain the religious meaning of that day.

But this section is actually where the almanac-style material is placed, on one line per date.

There are weather forecasts:

Settembre 1 Ultimo Quarto... Prime piogge abbondanti mitgano la tempuratura estiva.
September 1 Last quarter... the first heavy rains moderate the summer temperatures

Rhyming proverbs with religious morals:

A chi crede - Dio provvede
To those who believe - God provides

Beato chi vede con l'occhio della Fede
Blessed are those who see with the eye of faith

And general philosophizing, mostly expressed in rhyme:

Chi spreca ogni risorsa - non termina la corsa
Who squandered every resource - does not finish the race

There are proverbs that seem equivalent to some in English:

Dove sta la rana - l'acqua non è lontano
Where is the frog - water is not far
["Where there's smoke there's fire"]

Non dire mai "gatto!" - se non l'hai nel sacco
Never say "cat" - if you have not in the bag
["Don’t count your chickens..."; but with disturbing imagery]

Like the messages inside chocolate baci wrappers, there are lovely-sounding Italian rhymes that fall flat in English:

Amor perso in un momento - non si riacquista in anni cento
Love lost in a moment – will not return in one hundred years

Quando soffia Madam Fortuna- i granelli fan presto una duna
When it blows Madam Fortuna soon fans grains into a dune

Awkward translation grammar isn't too hard to clean up, but idioms that stump the translator have me stumped, too:

Di ogni altro amore è perno - il sincero amor materno
Each pin is another love - the true maternal love

Non c'è mucca così netta - che non abbia una macchietta
There is no clear-cut cow - which has not a speck

There are even weather and agricultural reports in rhyme:

Se piove il quattro di Settembre - si sta a bagno fino a Dicembre
If it rains on the 4th of September - it will soak until December

Settembre amico - apre mandorla e fico
September friend - opens [start of harvesting?] almond and fig

And, were truer words ever written?

Bolli, scartoffie e fogli - il mondo è pieno d'imbrogli
Stamps, paperwork and spreadsheets - the world is full of tricks

And in a world full of managers like the guy in the sheepskin: one can only try to look absorbed in the spreadsheets, while praying the boss takes note and walks on by...

Frate Indovino: August Augur

"Traffic Report"

Cartoon based on the proverb of the month, "Who goes slowly goes safely and far."

A discussion follows, with additional proverbs/thoughts on safety and traffic.

Of course, these expressions usually don't translate well—even more so when they are just plugged into a program.

But, tortured syntax and all, this seems to contain plenty of good sense:

Today, thanks to the miracles of progress, can also change the proverbs. And then there are those who think it is useless to continue to lower speed limits, especially for those who want to bust, 50 or 100 does the same. And then the proverb says: "Never did good dog chain." Has anyone else tried to make us even on irony: "If we think about it, the more you stay on the road, the greater the chances of accidents: prudence therefore advised to go at full speed." (Lucie Olbrechts-Tyteca). The reasoning seems to spin, but when we open the newspaper or turn on the TV, always jumps out of the usual news: "A long row, close the street, made a pass and so be it!" In life you can correct many errors, but in traffic, no, "It is true that those who arrive late ... bad park," but it is equally true that "we must not disturb the misfortunes when they sleep." Psychologists say that to protect the shell of your car, even the timid become lions, but what's the point then, if you just fall back rabbits? In conclusion, my advice is to drive carefully in mind cleared, and moderate speed, without competition of strength or cunning, and above all respect the traffic lights (keep an eye on the yellow ... traitor), because in crazy and chaotic bustle of life today, were the only instruments capable of us together.

The "Favorable Days" prediction sounds pretty much like Italian traffic:

unfavorable critical months that cause psychological distress in addition to possible geophysical consequences.

Frate Indovino: Summer Seer

"All for one, and...?!"

The theme of "strength in unity" leads to the subject of a previous gag. We are reminded that

Our constitution begins by declaring in a solemn and peremptory manner, "The Italian Republic is founded on work.'"

And yet,

A gentleman, invited to visit a factory, had a question: "How many people work in your company?"
- "Well, about one in ten."

In the stars:

on July 11 a total solar eclipse will be visible in the South Pacific, Chile and Argentina, for five minutes and 20 seconds ...
Magnetic storms: low activity
Favorable days: continues to be a critical period for the hypersensitive, with days of great instability in the last ten days of the month.

Frate Indovino, June: Sixth Soothsaying

"Some like it hot..."

This month's celestial phenomena include:

...marked sunspot activity in the first and last five days of the month; a constant electric atmospheric level above average. Disruption expected to sufferers of heart and lungs due to magnetic storms, with general mood swings possible.

--Beware, particularly, of soccer fans?

"The new secret of health from the library of Frate Indovino":

Take seeds of oats without depriving them of shell: Boil 2-3 handfulls in one and a half liters of water, reduce to 1 liter, then drink during the day. Roasted seeds are used for the preparation of a coffee laxative and are a nutritious addition to great advantage in treating hemmoroid and inflammation of the digestive system.

--Possibly soothing to the soccer fans?

Frate Indovino: May Magus

This month's cartoon:

The politicians of one side cry out for "Justice! Honesty! Transparency!"
The side in power hears not a sound...
Change sides; repeat process.

With the observation, "None so deaf as who doesn't want to hear," commentary and aphorisms about politics follow.

Two persons "of undoubted competence" are quoted:

"Politicians are the same everywhere: they promise to build bridges even where there are no rivers." - Chruščëv

"In politics always follow the right path, because you are sure to never meet anyone." - Bismarck

This month's astronomical curiosity is another constellation promoted by Lalande, the cat constellation guy.

This time around, Lalande proposed a constellation named after the Montgolfier brothers. The balloon-shaped constellation was to be south of Aquarius and Capricorn. Interestingly, the Italian term for "hot-air balloon" is "montgolfiera."

This is followed by—Capuchin vaudeville turns?

Well, one liners, anyway:

- "The Italian Republic is founded on work..."
- "Whose?"

Another item is headed, "Strizzatina d'occhio!" ["Wink!"]

Yes, humor is hard to translate, and this is based on preposition use that doesn't work in English. Even so, some jokes never retire:

- "Excuse me, Stationmaster, is there a Marsala train?"
- "No, the trains nowadays are electric or diesel."

Frate Indovino: April Astrologer

"Publicity," says our cartoonist, "costs us dearly!"

The theme continues with the opposing quotes connundrum: is publicity/advertising "the soul of commerce" [H. Ford], or, "commerce of the soul" [M. Marchesi]?

Though I suspect the possibility of some false cognates, Google Translate wants to tell me that a look at the skies deems this month favorable for all human activities that are intellectual and sensitive...

Even without the reminder of being innundated by "publicity," I don't expect the planets to win out on this.

Among Frate Indovino's earthly advice is a monthly section for Donne, beginning with some cliché under the heading, "It is Said Of Women"...

This month:

Nelle donne s'ammira la virtú – ma la civetteria piace di piú!

This seems to be, "Women admire virtue but love coquettery the most"...

Followed by what thought were chocolate recipes—those would occupy the coquettish women productively.

Then I ran the text through the translator: the section is several paragraphs of instructions for removing chocolate stains, fresh or old, from all kinds of fabrics.

Which must be the almanac's secret to a happy home: Mamma feeds everyone chocolate and keeps busy cleaning up after them...

Frate Indovino: March Monk

"And come back accompanied by your parents!"

Some advice from the good brother: "If you want the bread, don't sit on the oven."

Followed by thoughts of gardening, with an enticing list of all that can be started in a protected place, including meloni, basilico, peperoni, pomodori...

Among this month's star lore, there's this—

Curiosity - Extinct Constellation: The Cat was introduced in '700 [1799, according to this] by the French Lalande in honor of his favorite animal, the cat, in fact. To lovers of this cat, it might seem unfair that in the sky are numerous references to the dog and none to him. Although the French scholar had placed the cat in the firmament, in the zone between Indra and the air-pump (two constellations of the southern hemisphere) with the 1922 meeting of the International Astronomical Union, it was removed from official maps.

As to those particular astronomers: a March felis waiting in the wings for the next post might have something to say about them...

Frate Indovino: February Friar

"Until the boat leaves..."

The spiritual skygazer predicts:

Planetary positions: Mercury on the 10th passes by the sign of Capricorn in Acquarius. Venus on the 11th passes Aquarius [to?] Pisces. Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune are stationed in the signs of the previous month (Leo, Pisces, Libra, Pisces and Aquarius).

Sunspots: occur early this month and after the third week. Magnetic storms: some geomagnetic failure in the first half of the month. Favorable days: concentrated after the middle of the last ten days. Special meteor sensitivity will occur early in the month.

Happy New Frate Indovino!

My sister, J., received this piece of unsolicited matter, which she recycled to me.

It was enough to make me promptly break the rule I had just set about posting "vintage" printed matter.

Though this is the latest version, the publication itself does go back, first appearing in 1946. The original and subsequent covers are displayed by year at the calendar's site. (There's also a selection of covers at the site's main page.)

Although I first thought the Santa Claus-like figure must be an imaginary character, Frate Indovino was the nickname of a Capuchin brother who dispensed folk wisdom, herbal remedies and astrological predictions, along with soliciting funds for the order's missions in the Amazon.

After learning of the publication's existence, J. had fun researching it (and sent me all the links below).

At the very end of a 2002 National Catholic Reporter column, "The Word From Rome"—

...there is a push on in Italy to canonize a Capuchin known as Frate Indovino, who died recently at 87, and whose name roughly translates into English as "Brother Fortuneteller." His claim to fame was an annual calendar he published for almost 60 years, beginning in 1946, which sold some six million copies each year. It featured uncannily accurate predictions of the future. Most concern when to plant seeds or prepare the harvest, but they were occasionally more sweeping. Frate Indovino claims, for example, to have foreseen the fall of the Berlin Wall. How? He studied star cycles in an observatory near Florence, in addition to drawing on a 14th century monk known as "Black Spider" who developed a theory about the sun's influence on the atmosphere. In other words, he used astrology, though each prediction was verified by an inner voice that he recognized as his guardian angel. Frate Indovino was thus, to invoke a theological label, a model of syncretism, blending elements of pre-Christian folk religiosity focused on the stars with traditional Catholic spirituality. It's fascinating that nobody in authority seems troubled by this, in a moment in which fear of syncretism involving Christianity and Eastern religions such as Buddhism and Hinduism is the Vatican's top doctrinal concern. But, as I have repeatedly said in other contexts, if you're looking for a perfectly consistent religion, the Catholic Church isn't for you.

And a writer in Milan says—

...what has always intrigued me about the Italian calendar market is that if every year, the starlets bare more...they still can't beat a defunct priest.

Frate Indovino ("brother fortuneteller") passed to the other side in 2002, but sales of his folksy calendar still outstrip the rest. The popularity of the calendar, first published in 1946, is homespun wisdom rooted in daily weather forecasts -– the calendar first gained popularity with farmers in Father Mariangelo’s native Perugia in Umbria for the accuracy of predictions. The secret sauce was said to be a 15th-century manuscript from the monastery archives.

The calendar, which sells between six and eight million copies yearly in Italy and abroad, dispenses pearls of wisdom like: "Since onions produce tears, chop them in moments of political or emotional turmoil" as well as recipes, folklore and proverbs. Sales of the calendar, which retail for about $5 each, fund the order’s missionary works.

This year's theme: "Our Crazy, Dear Italy." Celebrating 149 years of Italian 'unity' [quote marks are the artist/author's]. A fond look at "typical Italian behavior," with cartoon animals standing in for Italians.

For January:
A nervous Mr. Bear notes the "imbroglio" over his diagnosis. And Dr. St. Bernard responds: "It's a good sign the patient recognizes his dilemma!"

With the saints' days included in the calendar (below the monthly cartoon)—maybe divine intervention will help those crazy, dear Italians!

The almanac does seem to be a big part of the country's popular culture.

There's a facebook page.

And Italian photoshop artist Gian Boy 2 presents this version of the good brother. The artist also portrays model "Ricky" as some other interesting personae [but some are NSFW or airports]—in this set.